The relentless wibble, compressed: a summary of the second week's activities in the Big Blogger house.
Thursday June 16.
Just after midnight, Big Blogger announces the third task: a poem from each housemate, starting with the words "Big Blogger is".
Vicus Scurra is the first to complete the task, less than an hour after it was announced.
Quickos talks of sunbathing, helping Clair in the shed, and helping Mike to set up a special disco.
Gordon, Dr Rob, Clair, Mike, Zoe and Alan complete the task.
Little Blogger surveys the scene in the house, and announces a "question and answer" session in the Diary Room. Vicus Scurra is the first in the Diary Room, followed by Zoe and Vitriolica.
Vitriolica completes the poetry task, apologises for its crapness, and provides an oil painting by way of recompense.
Friday June 17.
Quickos is up first, with an early morning report. Noting a certain degree of hostility to the little fella, Big Blogger canvasses opinion: should Quickos stay or go? In the comments box, opinion is mixed.
Miss Mish completes the poetry task twice over, in both haiku and limerick formats.
In the Diary Room, Mike, Miss Mish, JonnyB, Dr Rob and Alan submit to the "question and answer" task, with many housemates expressing concern at the volume of posts.
The tasks are coming thick and fast, as Big Blogger announces a mini-assignment for the weekend: a set of five house rules from each housemate.
Gordon sneaks out for the weekend. JonnyB provides poetry. Mike and Dr Rob (or "Stalin Incarnate") lay down some rules.
Saturday June 18.
A quiet day. Dr Rob writes a second poem, for Fathers' Day. Vitriolica and Miss Mish make some rules. NML completes the poetry task, Michael Jackson style.
Sunday June 19.
Another quiet day. The Girl answers questions in the Diary Room. NML and Zoe make rules. The Girl and Mr Hair are the last housemates to complete the poetry task, with Mr Hair scraping home just six minutes before the deadline.
Vitriolica has an explanation for the lack of activity in the house over the weekend... and it ain't the heat.
Monday June 20.
Alan and Mr Hair make the rules. Gordon sneaks back in, and answers questions in the Diary Room. Dr Rob photographs some of the sunbathing housemates.
Tuesday June 21.
After three quiet days, Tuesday brings a swarm of activity, with plot twists, evictions, and huge lashings of controversy.
On one of his customary early morning strolls, Dr Rob prepares for eviction. The "rules" task ends with JonnyB's contribution, while NML brings up the rear with the Diary Room "questions and answers" task.
Just before midday, Vitrilolica wakes the still slumbering house, noisily. A demob-happy Dr Rob joins in.
Big Blogger announces the first evictions, ordering Grocerjack and Dr Rob to pack their bags. Grocerjack gets the boot for not completing the second and third tasks, while Dr Rob is voted out by the public, with 19% of the popular vote. Downing his last cup of Cillit Bang (the house tipple), Dr Rob says his farewells.
Big Blogger announces the fourth main task: a lonely hearts advertisment.
In a shock plot twist, Mike exercises his special prerogative, granting Dr Rob a last minute reprieve from eviction, and substituting the housemate with the second highest number of votes: Mr Hair. His claim that "the tea leaves made me do it" falls on deaf ears, as uproar breaks out in the comments box. All that remains is for Big Blogger to confirm the decision.
As if a double eviction wasn't enough, Quickos also announces his departure: he has decided to visit Mike's partner K, in order to keep him company in Mike's absence.
In the midst of this pandemonium, an arachnophobic Zoe freaks out in the toilet.
Little Blogger returns from surgery, and marvels at what he has missed.
Vitriolica kicks off the "lonely hearts" task.
Wednesday June 22.
A reprieved Dr Rob (literally) turns over a new leaf, and places an illustrated lonely hearts ad.
Other lonely hearts ads are placed by Mike, Gordon and Alan.
In the Diary Room, Gordon requests an extension to the task deadline, which is granted by Big Blogger. Big Blogger also asks the housemates to provide secret nominations for this week's public vote.
The lonely hearts task is continued by Miss Mish, Zoe, Vicus Scurra, JonnyB and The Girl.
In the evening, Dr Rob treats the housemates to a film.
Clair is still in the shed, where she has been since the previous Wednesday. What is she building in there?