Big Blogger asked us for a picture...

...and so here is mine. Hello housemates! Hello viewers! My name is Mike. Goodness, but these posts are flying thick and fast this morning. I do hope you're all managing to keep up.

As mentioned yesterday, I have somehow managed to squeeze all of life's bare essentials into my Samsonite Executive Premier Plus trunk (with built-in vanity unit). Yes, I know that Big Blogger stipulated a small suitcase only - but believe me, this constitutes "travelling light".

Not being one of life's natural packers, I asked my partner K for some assistance in choosing my outfits for the next seven weeks (should I survive that long). It took us a while to "theme" my look, but we've plumped for Classic with a Contemporary Twist. So expect plenty of crisp whites, hot pinks, cool candy stripes, and bold, funky checks in wittily contrasting shades. And that's just the shirts.

Oh, and not to be outdone by Miss Mish in the millinery stakes - I've brought my new hat. (John Galliano, but we don't go by the labels.)

Other items include:

• A comprehensive selection of Molton Brown grooming products, including a bottle of "Arctic Birch" bath and shower gel (with pump action dispenser) which is my gift to the house. Please feel free.
• A 40gb iPod, with headphones (for private contemplation) and speakers (for early evening cocktail jazz, and late night disco dancing).
• Several slabs of Green & Blacks chocolate (very good for the heart), which I shall be divvying out after dinner each night.
• A mysterious little brown bottle, labelled "room odoriser" (not so good for the heart), which I shall be keeping in the fridge. This has already come in handy.
• A hand-made "Big Blogger" mix CD, which I shall be leaving behind as a prize for the eventual winner.

As for personal qualities: I would like to make one thing clear, right from the start. There is far too much nonsense talked on these sorts of shows about "being yourself", with everyone singling out "being two-faced" as the greatest of all possible sins. To which I say: phooey. For what you might call "being two-faced", I call "having good manners". For that reason, I shall be conducting myself like any normal, civilised human being: bitching about people behind their backs (but only to trusted confidantes, as and when the need arises, and never gratuitously), whilst continuing to be courteous and respectful to their faces. It's the way of the world, people. Don't knock it. After all, I'm just being myself...

Looking around at my fellow housemates, I see some old friends (Miss Mish, Gordon, Zoe, JonnyB, Vitriolica and the perpetually recumbent Peter), some familiar acquaintances (Clair, Alan and The Girl), and some brand new faces (Grocerjack, Mr Hair, Dr Rob, NML and Vicus Scurra). As is usual in such situations, I have so far been clinging to my familiar little clique, whilst gazing nervously over at the others. Who is going to make the first move and break the ice? Do we need some "getting to know you" games? And why is The Girl licking her lips at me like that?

Finally, to those of you who have been wondering how we're all going to cope over the next few weeks - cooped up in our own little space, cut off from outside reality - I say: hey, we're bloggers, remember? Welcome to our world!