Show Some Mercy

When you woke up this morning, what did you do? Press the snooze button and cuddle up to your partner for five more minutes? Climb out of bed and into a nice hot power shower that woke you up ready for the day ahead? Cooked yourself a nice hearty breakfast to set yourself up for the day?

You are one of the lucky ones. It could all be so much different.

Imagine it for one moment. Imagine waking up. Imagine that you are not in your own bed, but somewhere else. Imagine that when you wake up you see nothing ahead in your life but abject misery. Imagine a sense of horrific, unending desperation and despair. Imagine waking up with no hope that anything will ever be different. Imagine waking up in the knowledge that today, just as on every other day of your life so far……

…… you are Mick Hucknall!

For years, scientists the world over have been searching for a solution to this problem. But the work is desperately underfunded. We need action, and we need it now. So we in the Organisation to Save Hucknall Interminable Terror (O-SHIT) announce our plans for a major fundraising event to raise both money and worldwide awareness of the abject misery that this condition causes. Ladies and Gentleman I give you:

GINGER POP!

A day of music and events for all the family, the main event will be the concert on the "There But For The Grace of God" stage, hosted by Chris Evans and headlined by Art Garfunkel, with performances from Geri "Ginger Spice" Halliwell and the ginger one from Girls Aloud, plus a special appearance from Bob Geldof, who isn’t ginger but told us that if people were actually going to pay to listen to him sing he’d support fucking seal clubbing.