Friday, July 1

Task 6:Singles Are Doing It For Themselves

Buckingham Palace opens it's doors to single people everywhere so that we can celebrate the fact that not only is it ok to be single, but that we're not going to be worried about ending up alone, never getting married or being found dead in our flats two weeks after dying with Alsatians feasting on us. This is party for every person that ever had to hear:

Don't worry, it'll happen to you one day.
Where are my grandchildren?
Be careful - you're heading into that zone where you could be left on the shelf.
Oh you 'career' women......
When are you going to 'get' yourself a boyfriend/girlfriend?

And every other comment that you've endured because you're not parading a partner, wedding ring or child.

Michael Jackson will give a special performance (I don't have any celebrations without him) and Tony Blair will be giving a five minute speech explaining new tax breaks for single people. A host of single people will give speeches, naturally I will be one of the people in that line up but recently famous single people such as Jennifer Aniston will be rallying the singles. Food will be provided by Wagamamas with copious amounts of alcohol, and the night will end with tunes from the 70s, 80s and 90s.

Every attendee will get a goodie bag consisting of:
Keys to a new home (for the non home owners)
2 free passes for a speed dating night
£100 Selfridges voucher

The Queen has advised that I can have her room for the night and I will probably drink so much I end up chucking up in her crown!

1 Comments:

Blogger ~Moi~ said...

yay! something to look forward to! Did I miss the get-together? gez :p

4:59 PM  

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